For those of you who have raised children, my reason for going from conscientious, thoughtful, healthy, inspiring blogger on a path of enlightenment and growth to a hunched,mindless, drooling, ogreish eating machine, can be explained in one simple word: TEENAGER
Ah, the drama of the teenager - drama that has caused many a parent to turn to food, alcohol or prescription medication.
Anyway - I have decided to come up for a breather from the kiddie tub filled with jello. I have decided to pull my fists out of the bags of BBQ potato chips. I have decided to remove my Drink Beer Hat from my head. It is time to examine what has happened, regroup, and restart.
First of all, while most people will agree that a teenager can push any parent over the edge - it is probably not really a good enough reason to give up on all of the progress I have made over the past few months. In retrospect, I don't think my eating was so much a way to numb my feelings as a sudden lack of caring about myself. As soon as some outside factor took my focus away from me, none of my healthy changes mattered anymore. I guess I haven't arrived yet - I still need to find a balance.
I need to let go a little bit, and work on myself in spite of the thoughts and actions of my loved ones (no matter how insane or inane those thoughts and actions might be). I need to find a way to love and care without letting those feelings steal all of my focus and concentration. My son has chosen a path, and even if I don't agree with that path, it is his decision to make. His decision, however, cannot become my excuse for altering my own chosen path. I need to renew my dedication to myself and work at letting nothing - not even teenage drama - get in the way.
So, I am starting over. Beginning now.
You go girl!!! Things have been a little rough around here too and I also need to think about my well being and not let the drama of family get me down. Thanks Kristi!! I needed that!!
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